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An idea inspired by math word problems
brought home by my 11 year old son. Recently published by Duck &
Herring Co. and appearing in their Winter 2007 Pocket Field
Guide.
Grid
Logic
· The woman who fakes motion
sickness so she can ride in the front seat also fakes orgasm with
her husband at least twice a month. She never fakes it with her
neighbor in the yellow house.
· The person seated behind the
driver thinks the driver ought to buy dandruff shampoo and stop
watering the lawn at midnight with someone else’s hose.
· The man in the back seat
doesn’t mind sitting in the middle because it reminds him of his
childhood car trips to the Jersey Shore where he spent an inordinate
amount of time clamming and later jacking off under a salty beach
blanket as his sister gave blowjobs to the Coast Guard interns.
· Jane lives in a blue house
where a cat suns in the window and children are never allowed in the
living room, but a teenager decorates bedroom walls with black spray
paint and decides plywood is great acoustic flooring.
· The driver is especially
careful and law-abiding, knowing full well the trouble waiting if
another motorcycle cop signals the BMW to pull over, agreeing there
is no good explanation for the .357 in the glove box or the cube of
hash under the seat.
· The daughter of Samuel is
currently skipping school and enjoying a massage at Spa Siedel on
the credit card of her ex-boyfriend’s stepfather, who she will meet
later at the Marriot in suite 342, after calling home on her cell
phone and telling her mother that she’s sleeping over at Ginny’s.
·Robert, who is secretly in love
with the woman in the backseat, believes he has herpes. He hasn’t
driven in three weeks.
· Two women kiss and no one
thinks anything of it. They have no idea that the woman in the
yellow house doesn’t really visit her sick Aunt in Chicago every
other weekend.
· The son of the driver is an
excellent student and wants to be a cop or a paratrooper, but he has
the feeling he won’t live to be 20, and this keeps him up most
nights, that and the sound of someone watering.
Using grid logic, answer the
following questions.
1. Should Jane divorce Robert and
move to Idaho with Victoria?
2. Will Samuel kill himself with
the bullets his son has hidden in his
underwear drawer?
3. If Samuel dies and the ladies
move away, is two enough for a carpool when one person doesn’t drive
and the other doesn’t have a car?
 click
on shoes to go home
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